Tag Archives: the unauthorized biography of michele bachmann

Chapter 23: An Actual Article

OK, now we’re getting somewhere. The Capital Times of Madison has published their article on me and if you don’t live in Madison, WI, you can read it here.

This article was based on an interview I did over at Barriques coffee shop. It turned out well. It was a surprising turn of events given that I’d expected a blurb of some sort, but this is one of the reasons I really love Madison. The arts are supported on a ridiculous level. Ridiculous good, I mean.

There’s only one problem: for some reason, searching for my name on Amazon.com doesn’t bring up the Kindle version of the book. And really, that’s just perfect, isn’t it? A really nice article comes out in Madison’s favorite newspaper and now people are going to have to work extra hard to find the book? Well. Maybe it’s just my computer or something. Maybe I’ve searched for it too many (thousands) times.

The next step is to put up a copy of this article at my local Starbucks, clearly. I’ll clear out all those pesky “donate to the hungry” flyers on the bulletin board. OK, I’ll just move them a little to make space.

Update: I just stopped by the local grocery store and giddily grabbed, like, 20 copies of The Cap Times. Yes, people gave me a strange look.

 

More Stuff:

Another interview coming out. I got to email this one so I really took my time on it.

The book will be featured as the Frugal Pick on January 20th on The Kindle Reader.

I’m in the process of putting the book on NOOK. It’s a pain in the ass and will take a few days.

Chapter 8: Print Edition!

Print Edition Available!

You can buy the print edition on Amazon for just $10.00. It’s more expensive than the Kindle edition. Why? Because it’s printed. That’s the downside, but for some people a print edition is preferred regardless of price. The upside? Now I can send some review copies out to more people.

Success!

A good interview with a newspaper has been completed. I’ll put a link up as soon as it’s published. Needless to say, I was more than a little nervous. I just let it all out, too. Why not? Shit, this could be the only interview ever of all time. Unless I get something published.

Success!

A few more reviews coming out (eventually). It’s a slow process and I understand, but on the upside it’s amazing how many people are devouring books on their Kindles and writing about it. The downside: a lot of those downloads are coming in the form of terrifying low-cost Twilight rip-offs.

Trouble!

Dear newspaper editor:

Why are you hiding from me? I know your deadline nights. I know you want to review this book because it will fill up space and you won’t have to write another “article” recapping last night’s “Dancing With the Stars.” I will find you. I will speak to you or I will not cease this crusade.

Weird!

I totally sent a copy of the book to a Kindle fan site in India. I don’t know why … maybe just because they have so many people there and the odds seem in my favor.

Chapter 7: The Bookslut Denies My Advances (#irony)

Small Success

So here’s a link to a little blip from UW-Eau Claire on my “success.” I think it’s really, really nice that they call it that. However, UW-Eau Claire’s newsletter does not have a “failures” section for obvious reasons, so who knows what the ratio is?

 

The Ongoing Battle

An interview with a newspaper on Monday. Nervous? Yup, a little bit. But I’m just gonna let it all out. This could be the only interview I ever get (it’s possible!), so there’s no point in holding back. You want drama? Action? Adventure? Sex? I will provide all of it in gory detail.

In addition, I also shot an email to a couple reviewers who were hesitant about reviewing an e-book announcing that I could now provide them with a print copy, which will be available soon on Amazon.com. And for just ten bucks, too! Hot dog. Well, it turns out so far I’m the only one who’s excited.

 

“Let me in, damn it!”

Efforts to get a review copy to the Bookslut have failed.

In my email correspondence with her gatekeeper, I was told (in a nice sort of way, I should mention) that the Bookslut only receives copies from the publisher. While this is understandable, I in no way was willing to take “No” for an answer immediately. My response was thus (in a nutshell):

“Any way I can convince you to let me send it your way? How about some legitimacy? Here’s a Newpages review of one of the stories featured in the collection, originally published [in] the fantastic lit journal Gargoyle:
http://www.newpages.com/literary-magazine-reviews/2010-08-30/
” End quote.

It was a no go. I still count myself a fan of the Bookslut, and perhaps one day when she’s feeling particularly slutty, she might consider dropping me an email requesting my collection. I think “slutty” in this sense would have to mean “interested in reading another book.”

Anywho, more emails to write this weekend, and another phone call to make. You see, dear newspaper editor, I know your deadline schedule. Not calling me back is no longer an option. You will either review my book, or awkwardly explain you refuse to.

Chapter 4: Some Failure, Some Success

Just a minor note: HarperCollins is thinking about adding advertisements to their e-books soon. This, right here, is a publisher that’s taken more “seriously” than small presses. This, right here, is a publisher that laments “the death of reading.” Their solution to fixing their revenue problems? Ads. In books. See where I’m going here?

This weekend, I sent out around 40 emails to various book review sites/blogs, in addition to pursuing more contacts with various newspapers, etc. I personalized all of it, but the gist was pretty simple: “This book is available.”

I received a few responses.

 

First Response: Failure

Big-time reviewer: “We only accept copies from the publisher.” (Read: “We don’t review self-published books.”)

Me: “So … if my publisher were to send to a copy … ?”

Big-time reviewer: “Is it only available for download? We only review print copies.”

Me: “OK, so you got me on a technicality.”

I’m not letting this one go so easy. I’ll keep you updated on it. Also, there are still a few people who haven’t gotten back to me yet who I think really, really need a second phone call. That’s “phase two” of this week’s plans: Bug the shit out of people until they explain to me why they’re being ridiculous.

 

And Then: Some Success

Later in the evening on Saturday night, a reviewer got back to me and enthusiastically offered to review “a story.” I’ll take it. That’s a start. Whatever comes of it, at least the toes are dipped in the water. It’s encouraging, too. Receiving a response that isn’t a short-winded rejection is incredibly refreshing. It’s a small thing, granted, but the last thing I want to do is say I could have tried harder.

Another reviewer mentioned that they charge a $50 reading fee for ebooks. I assume this is mainly because 1) They can do it because they’re a well-loved, respected reviewer and 2)It provides some income to whatever poor sap gets assigned the usually horrible ebook to review. I’m OK with this. I know reading fees are considered “unprofessional,” but I have no problem with it whatsoever. Quite frankly, if they want to charge a fee and get paid for the service they’re providing, good. I distaste the idea that writers are “rewarding” reviewers by the very act of giving them a copy, which is kind of like giving them a work assignment.

Another small success: one of the local newspapers has asked for a digital copy of the collection. That was the end of the conversation. So I suppose maybe this isn’t good news. Maybe he just wanted a copy to distribute to pirate sites across the Internet. I, however, happen to believe in the goodness of people. So I will remain optimistic.

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